A couple of days ago, I met an old high school friend for coffee at the Alley in Moorpark. We couldn’t decide how many years had passed since we last saw each other, but we settled on that it had been at least 15+ years. You guys, 15 YEARS!!! That’s a very long time. But the crazy thing is we picked up right where we left off, as if it was just yesterday we had seen each other. You see, she had read my book. She knew the chapters of my life and thus made it incredibly easy to fall back into a beautiful, comfortable friendship!

The Elusive Unicorn

There is really something special about a true friendship that has spanned many years! Like an elusive unicorn, it can be an unrealistic thing to hope to find!

People move. 

People change. 

We look to social media for our relationships. 

We get busy! 

Whatever the reason, sometimes a friendship just ends. 

But I am here to challenge that! After enjoying a wonderful cup of coffee and some really great laughs, I started thinking that maybe the problem with losing friendships isn’t really about things ending but that we really don’t take the time anymore to ask to read each other’s books!

I Want to Read Your Book

When we first meet someone, we tend to relate by things we have in common.  It is usually something easy to find, like the age of our kids. Or the career of our husbands. Maybe even an activity our kids are involved in. But I think as moms we forget to be really curious about the person we meet.  We don’t ask questions or search to know who the person is by getting to know all about them; past and present!  We don’t take the time to read the different chapters of each others’ books. 

I want my friends to really know me.  And that means knowing about the chapter of my first heart-break. And don’t forget to read about the chapter when I struggled with suicide and depression. Maybe for you it’s the chapter about the divorce or the lost job or lost child. How do we know the whole of a person if we do not know the whole of their story. We didn’t take the time to read their book; the book of their life. 

The 5 Love Languages

I read the book “The 5 Love Languages” way back in 2000! I know my love language; it is quality time. But now when people ask me what my love language is; I say “Questions”.  I feel so loved and valued when someone takes the time to ask about me….as a whole! When they ask to read the book of my life.

Your love language might be different but I think it is a safe bet to say we ALL like to be valued to the point that someone wants to truly know us!  When they take the time to read our book. 

Ask To Read a New Book

I am on a mission to make more friendships that are built on a foundation of reading each other’s books. Please ask me the hard questions and I want to ask you the questions that will help me know you. I want to know who you are.

Your past hurts.

And past struggles.

About the way you were raised.

Your dreams.

And your fears.

I think when I know these things I can be a friend who understands, gives grace and loves deeper.  Yes sweet, new friend I want to read your book; every single chapter! And I hope in exchange you want to read mine as well!


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