5 Things NOT to Say to a Pregnant Momma

Being pregnant brings out every emotion imaginable. I struggled with a lot of stress during mine. For the most part, I still feel in debt to those who helped and supported me during a rocky nine months. That being said, I certainly got my share of “helpful” comments and tips that were either annoying or just plain rude. 

My girl, Mabel, is nearly three and it’s been interesting when I talk to other moms. Turns out, none of us are safe from unwanted lines and invasive inquiries. These are the top ones that have stuck out for me as far as “Please, do not say this.” 

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“Are You Getting an Epidural?”

This question got stale quickly. Although my plan was to have an unmedicated birth, several people felt the need to encourage me to never go through labor without one. While the other half told me scare tactics and all of the reasons to never, ever get one. 

Since Mabel was my first experience with labor, there is no way to predict before you’re in the hot seat (or bed) if an epidural is for you. That’s something I feel should be determined once you’re about to give birth. Please, quit asking expectant mothers if they will get one. That’s a very personal decision and unless your insight is requested, don’t go there. 

“I LOVED Being Pregnant”

As I said, I was someone who had nonstop physical ailments and mental stress during my pregnancy. Hearing repeatedly that others adored their pregnancies just made me sad and angry. I adore my daughter and wouldn’t trade her for anything, but I did not enjoy being pregnant. I made it very clear yet continued to hear this quip. 

Please, learn to read the room. If a mom is obviously miserable in her skin waiting to pop, we don’t need to know how wonderful the time was for you. 

“I Wanna See Your Bump”

Having been through a pregnancy, I think I would be more laid back about my appearance if I ever went down the baby route again. My first time? Not so much. I’ve always been on the slimmer side and to suddenly have an extra 60 pounds on me was a huge adjustment. I didn’t enjoy having my picture taken and despite people meant it as a positive, it was insulting for me when anyone asked me to show them a photo of me and my “bump.”

If someone isn’t posting updates on their social media, take that as a sign not to ask. It’s a baby. It’s a bump. 

“Don’t Get Induced!”

I was petrified of getting induced. Numerous people told me it’s a “one-way ticket to a C-section.” While I tried my hardest to not get induced, it turned out to be the best decision for us. Yes, I do think medical professionals are too quick to induce without legitimate concerns. I had reasons to go ahead and do so. Best part? Those “helpers” who told me I’d end up with a C-section were 100% incorrect. 

Just like with pain management, these are very personal decisions that shouldn’t be the topic of chit-chatting. 

“When is Your Baby Getting a Sibling?”

I need to take my own advice on this one. I’ve been too nice when asked this. Usually, by strangers. Random people at the beach. In the market line. At holiday parties. It is nobody’s business if and when you’ll be having more children. I was appalled when a tired momma friend with a newborn and two-year-old told me her relatives were already asking when the next baby would be coming. 

The worst is how they keep at it when I politely answer them. “Oh, it’s not fair to not have another,” “You’ll regret it” and unnecessary things like that. Just stop, people. 

Share Your Thoughts

What are some lines you’ve heard while pregnant that you never want to hear again? I’d love to know in the comments!